Category Archives: Pipay


Howdy, ladies and gentlemen? It’s been awhile. Make no mistake. I’m very much alive. I still regularly check my mails and reply to those who drop a line. I just haven’t written anything new in this site until today.

What are the two worlds I’m pertaining to here? What else but your gay bar life and your real life. I assume most of you have a bar name (“Ashley” or something far from your real name which is Maragarita) and then a nickname people call you by at work or at home (Marge maybe, Margarita?). What happens when MD Shawn finds out in broad daylight that guest Ashley is actually Margarita a.k.a. Marge?


If you’re already a gay bar regular (and one who wishes to keep her real life separate from her gay bar life) then you should know what I mean when I say that you have to constantly be vigilant! Keep your eyes open, dear girl, and be on your tippy toes like a ballerina.

As I wrote in earlier posts, being a gay bar regular is not for everyone and most certainly not for the fainthearted. It’s not ideal for people who insist on keeping their personal lives private and very much separate. It would entail a lot of sneaking around and worrying. Tsk tsk. But if you’re already at that point when you’re a regular who wants (or has) to keep your real life separate then I guess I should just hope any pointers I write here actually helps.


One of the girls who just want to have fun recently had a close call. Several of them in fact. And I don’t mean just seeing an MD in a coffee shop. It was running into an MD in one’s actual place of work.

Allow me not to specify if it was Ella, Jess or myself who had that close call but suffice it to say that it was one of us. What happened? Well, an analogous case is that Nurse GJWTHF (girl just wants to have fun) actually saw MD X (whom she knows and has talked to inside a gay bar) in the hospital she works for. Nurse GJWTHF almost had to attend to MD X but good thing there were other nurses there and she wasn’t the one tasked to attend to the MD.

How’s that for a close call?


So what do you do in that scenario if you were Nurse GJWTHF? Fight of flight? Well, if you’re absolutely sure MD X hasn’t seen you yet then you could very well just slip away silently and take the flight option. What if you’re not sure? Or what if there were no other nurses there? Then take the fight option.

Why? First, you’re at work so you have to do your job. As a nurse you should attend to all patients of the hospital or clinic and MD X is not an exception if he is indeed a patient. Second, running away when MD X has already seen you (and worse, recognized you as a regular at the bar we works for) makes things worse. It makes you look as though you’ve done something wrong when in fact you’re probably just embarrassed or ashamed or both over having your two worlds collide with you so unprepared for such an event on that precise date when it happened. Lastly, you have to take it into account that MD X might not have recognized you (hey, people look different in the dark and when they’re dressed for a gay bar night than they do in their scrub suit or work wear) or that MD X might be equally embarrassed. A good of number of MDs don’t announce to the world that they do what they do for a living. I don’t think MD X would have written macho dancer in the field for occupation in his patient’s data sheet.


Come what may, just put on your game face and be brave. If ever MD X was crude enough to call you by your bar name with a sneer or say something rude then show that you’re in a different league. Don’t stoop down to his level. As Pipay, our regular FM, told me before: most of them in the GB industry know not to greet a guest they meet outside the bar unless the guest greets them first or unless the MD is with another MD from the same bar. Pipay said she doesn’t even greet a guest who’s shopping all by himself in a grocery store for fear that someone might be observing the guest and wonder why Pipay knows the guest.

Yes, most MDs (unless he’s terribly new or terribly crude) would also know better than to refer to your GB habits should you meet in public. The MD probably has a personal vendetta against you if he acts crudely. I remember how Florante was ever so polite to me when he and his guest saw me and my foster brother Luigi at a coffee shop last year. Florante called me Ma’am and only talked to me because he and Luigi used to work for the same bar.


Life is full of trade offs. One of the hazards of being a fun loving GB regular who wishes to keep her true identity secret is the possibility of running into an MD in your workplace or while you’re at work.

Bottomline is that you just have to stay classy and true to yourself. There must be a reason why your worlds suddenly collided. Embrace the lesson to be learned and just do your best in handling things. You can email me your experiences as well if you’re up to it. 🙂



The most noticed in the gay bar are the macho dancers of course. Next are the floor managers and the impersonators. There are other unsung behind the scenes employees though.


The waiters are often unnoticed unless they’re young and good looking. Waiters like that are often requested to dance and soon enough they turn into MDs. How about the waiters who are not MD-types?

Waiters often earn from food and drink commissions (apart from tips that are never at par with the tips the MDs get). They get a portion of the earnings from orders. I realized that belatedly. It suddenly made sense why Ben, our regular waiter in Earthling, was so eager to have us order food. It wasn’t because the MDs haven’t had a decent meal yet. It was so he, Ben, could earn from food commissions.

The waiters make good allies, mind you. They can be a little lenient or a little strict. They can also make sure the MD’s gin tonic is too harsh or just right. Ha-ha.


I was in line at the solo occupancy ladies room in Numero last Friday the 13th. The girl inside seemed to be taking her sweet time. I ended up making conversation with the bar employee tasked to be usher and make sure the ladies find the loo and are safely in and outta there. When a lady tried to cut in, I tapped her and told her I was in line. I further told the lady that if she can’t hold it in anymore, the men’s room was unoccupied. The girl looked surprised and then she and her companion actually took my suggestion and went inside the men’s room. That scene happened twice. Another girl tried to cut in and I made the same suggestion which she heeded.

The employee manning the loos looked at me in surprise and told me I was feisty. I told him I was only reminding the people that there was a line and no one gets to cut in. I was merely asserting my rights as first in line. Ha-ha. Finally the girl inside the ladies room exited. There were two of them at the same time as it turned out. They were buds. I guess friends who go to the loo together stay together.


The girls and I made friends with one Yaya in Earthling. I even bought food for her during the times I was buying food for Luigi. Indeed the gay bar yayas are underappreciated and underpaid. I once witnessed Keith shouting at the poor Earthling yaya. Bad Keith.

The yayas are in charge of making sure the MDs are dressed properly and made up especially when there are production numbers. The yaya is also in charge of making sure the MDs are where they’re supposed to be when it’s their turn to dance. I first got to know the Earthling yaya we befriended when she’d approach Keith or Ramon now and then to remind then that one more song and then it’s their turn to dance. Jamie told me that they have to give a tip to the yaya whenever they get tabled and get tips from guests. Same goes for the floor manager, waiter and the DJ.

I later found out that the yaya in Saturn washes the bikinis of the MDs for 100 pesos a month per MD. Whattaway to make a living. The only consolation is that the yaya probably gets a kick out of being with such hot young men all the time. More often than not the yaya is a gay guy so it all the more factors in the dynamics.


I already mentioned the diskjockey or DJ in passing as someone who gets a tip from the MD. The DJ is important because he introduces the MD and even comes up with a monicker for the MD. MD X can be called “Mr Universe” and he can be known as such for the rest of his career.

I remember the Earthling DJ that Pipay warned me to stay away from. Ha-ha. Thanks for that one, Pipay.


They are usually impersonators themselves or started out as such. The better the choreographer the better the production numbers.


Oh yes the guards are important figures. They ensure safety against potential raiders, rude customers and rude MDs as well. In Earthling the girls and I are sort of friends with their head guard. Ha-ha.


Indeed everyone should pitch in for a gay bar to succeed. It’s usually only the MDs that the guest remembers but there are many unsung heroes in the dark place with flickering lights and gyrating men.


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Yes, I saw for myself that evolution exists even in the gay bar industry. Surprise, surprise.


Pipay again requested an audience with Karl and myself. This time Pipay announced to us that it is confirmed that she’s moving to her greener pastures and leaving her old bar behind.

It really felt like an end of an era and the start of a new, more fab one when Pipay made her little announcement. Karl, on his part, seemed more concerned that there won’t be a ready pair of eyes and ears to watch over Karl’s Bimby. Not the case though. Pipay, like a dying aunt, knew how to find someone to take over the task she’s leaving behind.

In any case, Karl and I are excited for Pipay and her new work. Pipay invited us to visit her at her new bar along with Jess and Ella. The odds are high that the four of us will visit the bar together soon. Really soon.

And from Pipay we got a mountain of information again about our people of interest. This was especially because Pipay introduced Karl and me to another FM, Brita, who herself was a fountain of knowledge about people of interest to us. Karl especially benefited since Brita knew quite a lot about Bimby and Bimby’s FMs.

Here are some of the information that the girls and I especially found interesting:

Carlo and his Ella are encountering some tough luck lately. Ella’s foreigner-spouse has not been sending money and neither has Carlo’s enterprise(s) fared well.
Comment: our Ella didn’t want to say it at first but she ended up blurting out to Jess and me that indeed karma’s a b*tch.

Keith’s benefactor has a new MD-love from a different bar. Keith is no longer a kept man. Will he go back to dancing?

Red has a a new benefactor as well. This time the owner of a rather big enterprise as well. Red sure knows how to make ’em keep on taking it all hook, line and sinker. Bravo, Red, Bravo.

Essie and Nicholas are done. Nicholas is back to working as an MD.

Lito and Sylvester are both rather ‘plump’ nowadays.


Karl and I didn’t call it a night after our little pow-wow with Pipay. Instead, we used the night for Karl to avail of my present for him: twin drinks for his MD of choice as long as it was not BIMBY. Karl and I headed to Saturn. Karl’s intent was to make JC the benefactor of the twin drinks.

When we got to Saturn, a big surprise was waiting: the former lover of Bimby was there and was apparently employed in Saturn already. Whoa. Not only that but they actually recognized Karl in Saturn already. A bunch of people greeted Karl and called Karl by his bar name. Double whoa.

Tardy Boy and the filler

Sometimes the second-stringers just need a chance to show what they’ve got. Well, that was how the night turned out. JC was late. Very, very late that Karl already agreed to give a drink to CB, the young lad who perfectly exemplified the boy-next-door stereotype. Karl already noticed CB when we were there with Ella before but Karl feared that he could fall for a boy-next-door type.

As it turned out, Karl was happy with CB that night. CB was interesting enough for Karl and was a nice, provincial lad. CB was not a flirt though. Unlike with JC before, Karl and CB did not end up holding hands or touching. I liked that. The fact that CB did not come on too strong was a relief. Smooth operators like JC are more problematic.


Karl suggested that I give a drink to Wren that night. Wren was an eye candy for us in December. I don’t know why but my gut feel insisted I don’t give a drink to Wren that night. I told Karl I didn’t feel like giving a drink to Wren.

Of all tardy people to arrive in the bar halfway before closing time, JC was the one who arrived that night. Since Karl had a great time with JC the first time around, I thought it would be a fine idea to have Karl sit between JC and CB while I sit on JC’s other side so I can chat him up when Karl and CB are busy. Karl can talk to JC when CB is away to dance. Fine idea?

As it turned out, it was a fine idea to give JC a drink that night but not for the reasons I initially thought of. Instead it turned out to be a fine idea to give JC a drink so his true colors can be exposed. And my, my, what dark color it was.


Before we headed to Saturn, Karl and I learned that Red’s former generous lover from abroad used to be JC’s generous lover who bought JC a car. It’s a small world after all. Really. Going to Saturn, Karl and I already knew that JC is indeed a true smooth operator. Everything he says should be taken lightly and with many grains of salt (ha-ha).


JC got to Saturn drunk. He was already drinking with a guest somewhere (a booking?) before he went to Saturn. When he got to Saturn, JC told me he thought I was not happy to see him and maybe he better just to home. I told him fine but do so now before he touched the drinks so the same can be transferred to another Md. JC was surprised and he told me: “astig ka!” He was quiet for a while.

Soon enought JC was arrogant again and he kept putting down the contestants on stage in addition to hogging the rather large couch which almost made me fall to the floor a couple of times. I learned how much JC was hogging the couch when he went to the washroom and I was left on the couch with a big space between me and CB. The space could have sat two girls like me or one and half of a young lad like CB.

When JC returned from the washroom, I made him sit on the edge. I was not going to risk falling to the floor a second longer. JC was still a tad drunk and being obnoxious. When he said something and Karl asked me what it was JC said, I was about to say something to Karl when JC pulled me a little too hard to keep me from talking. It was a little too painful so I hit him rather hard and shoved him. JC had the audacity to say again that he’ll just leave and go home. I told him that was a fabulous idea. JC got up and that was that.

I called the FM and told her I was officially complaining about a rude, drunk MD. I told the FM no way was I paying for Jc’s half finished bottle. They could either cancel the orders or give twin drinks under CB’s name instead of JC’s. The FM looked so surprised that someone was actually complaining. The FM ran to whoever was in charge. In the end they allowed the drinks under JC’s name to be transferred to CB.


I wouldn’t call myself and the girls experts as GB guests but neither are we clumsy beginners. We knew how to assert our rights. We knew how and when to get rid of an MD who was not helping us have a good time in the bar. I’m glad I was able to dispose of that snooty JC.

CB later told me I did the right thing. Guests are guests precisely because they are to be treated well and respected. CB further shared that JC was really popular in Saturn and was never without a guest. I told CB that JC might think his popularity and good looks gave him the license to report for work drunk and not on best behavior but that was not going to fly with me and my friends. Especially not at this point when we know quite a lot. Ha-ha.

I felt a little guilty that Karl might be one ‘inspiration’ down now that we’ve seen JC’s true colors but oh well Karl has CB to take over.

CB vs. JC vs. BIMBY for KARL

Of course it’s inevitable that Karl’s relationship with any or either or all of these MDs will cause him pain. Love does that more so loving an MD you met in a guest-MD setting. That having been said, let me give my two cents on this whole CB-JC-Bimby for Karl.

Of the three, JC is out of the running after that night when he was a drunk A-Hole. He did not even send an SMS to Karl to apologize or otherwise explain his side after the incident. Radio silence from his end. I guess JC has one too many guests anyway.

I don’t know much about CB yet but offhand I have to say I favor CB over Bimby for Karl. For one, CB is better looking and has a better physique. Second, CB is a breath of fresh air compared to Bimby. Karl knows what I’m writing about here.

Of course, it would be best if Karl found a love that’s not an MD at all or one he did not meet in a guest-MD scenario.


So where’s the evolution? Well, Pipay is moving to her greener pastures for one. Also, I was able to prove to myself that I was not a timid gb guest. I knew how to assert my rights and not be scared to get rid of a rude MD no matter how popular or good looking he might be.

I did not have much fun with the show in Saturn that night because I found the whole contest thing tacky but it does not mean I didn’t have fun moments. I certainly enjoyed seeing some dances. I know how to have fun and I know my kind of fun. That for me is an evolution I’m mighty glad about.


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The first week of February was certainly not boring. Not for me, not for the girls and not for Karl. That’s how love month entered for us. As for our lives as gay bar guests, what gives? Well, you already know about Karl’s plight when he went to give Bimby a gift (with Bimby’s consent) only for Bimby not to even find a minute to get the gift personally and thank Karl. Bad Bimby. Bad, bad Bimby!

On the same night, Pipay was the one who received Karl’s gift for Bimby. Pipay also told Karl that he, Pipay, wanted an audience with Karl and myself to seek our advice about something he’s going through. Karl attested that Pipay really looked problematic and distraught. Karl immediately told me about Pipay’s request and I agreed to meet Pipay with Karl for coffee later that week.

Tardy Needy

I don’t know if it’s just me but when I’m the one who requests an audience with someone, I make it a point to be on time. Pipay was tardy that night. We were sending SMS to each other since early on but Pipay left home late. Pipay then went on to complain about traffic. Oh well.

Better than watching ENews

Talking to Pipay was better than watchig ENews or The Buzz. So much information (gossip) escaped from his lips that even Jess was amazed that I managed to remember them all. Of course I immediately told Ella and Jess all that Karl and I learned from Pipay. Here are some that I can tell you:

Red is really quite a liar. He apparently lied to us girls and Karl the last time we saw him over who really helped him when he was severely penalized for his dismal showing at a recent big event in the gay bar.

Oh, and Red has not only been caught by a guest-benefactor doing the deed once but twice (that we know of). One was with someone not his girl but that of another MD. Oh, and Red is (was?) also in a relationship with a married woman. What?! Red, Red. You’re really quite something.

Liam and Chloe are over. Wny? Because Chloe can no longer afford Liam’s requests. The latest one was for Chloe to buy Liam a car. Previous gifts given by Chloe include an expensive pendant, ring and bracelet. The gifts Chloe gave Liam are probably in the one hundred thousand pesos range if we will add ’em all up. Hmmm. No wonder Liam would rather do his ‘job’ rather than use his college course to earn a living. It’s sad to find out these things though.

As for Chloe, Pipay told me that Chloe definitely made the most of his, um, ‘investment’ in Liam. Chloe got his money’s worth from Liam. Good for Chloe. It would have been even more sad if Chloe didn’t after all that he has spent on Liam. Knowing Liam, he sees Chloe the same way he sees Ara and Demi: ATM machines.

A lot of floor managers (FMs) have been head over heels with MDs. Some even go as far as buying groceries for the MD’s family and befriending their wives. One even used to buy a Jollibee burger for the MD’s kid. Love, love, love.

Most of the other information we gathered have to do with Bimby and Bimby’s relationships with two FMs. Karl was shocked to find out that Bimby has actually lived in with an FM and still occasionally spends the night at the house of one. Karl felt disgusted when Pipay admitted the said stuff.


Pipay’s dilemma was whether to stay in the gay bar he currently works for or to move to another one which could be his greener pastures. Pipay got an offer that could definitely work out for him in the long run. Pipay though has never really been much of a risk-taker neither is he ambitious. He prefers to live simply and do what he knows best: being a floor manager.

Karl and I each gave Pipay advice. We emphasized that Pipay should talk to the owners of his current work place if he decides to leave. We told Pipay how important it is to give the owners some courtesy especially since the gay bar industry is small. We never know when Pipay will need to work for his current employers again should his new job (assuming he takes the offer) doesn’t work out. It’s best not to burn bridges.

FM: Not a job to be proud of?

I understand when MDs prefer not to tell people they meet outside the bar that they work as macho dancers. Apparently Pipay is not proud of being a floor manager as well. Pipay told Karl and me that he doesn’t tell others he works as an FM. He’d rather claim to be jobless and depending on his relatives rather than admit that he’s an FM.

Pipay also told us that he has a good number of good looking young men as friends outside the bar. Pipay denied that he helps these young men find, um, ‘clients’. “Bugaw na nga sa loob pati ba naman sa labas?” (Pimp inside the bar and outside?) was Pipay’s dialogue.

I was a little surprised. I never really thought of Pipay as a pimp. Nor did I ever generalize that FMs are pimps. I guess some people do though.


Love month has only started. I wonder what the rest of the month has in stored for the girls who just want to have fun, Karl and our people of interest? Stay tuned.


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The girls and I had coffee with Karl after dessert with the 3 MDs. We chatted and scrutinized the passers-by headed for a nearby dance bar. There were attractive people, there were not-so attractive ones and then there were characters. It was just a time to chill.

Ella was not in the best of moods. She was a little apprehensive over stuff involving her career. Jess and I wanted to go to a dance bar. Karl was okay with the idea. Ella wouldn’t budge from her seat even though it was her finding a certain guy headed for that dance bar attractive that triggered Jess’s and my desire to go to the said bar. In contrast to Ella, Jess was in one of her better moods.

Jess seemed too fascinated with Red and his texting though. The flirtation’s still there. Jess seems receptive somehow whether she realizes it or not. They are so NOT real brother and sister types. Ella finally told Jess to ignore Red’s messages and stop replying.

I for one so love it when the girls who just want to have fun are complete. Ella is the big sister and I don’t have to do anything other than enjoy myself as the lazy middle child. When Ella is not with us I have to fill her shoes. I prefer being the middle child. Really.

Before curfew struck, Jess dropped Ella home. I didn’t want to go home yet and neither did Karl. We stayed in the coffee shop and continued to observe people while blabbing away.


I was bored at some point. Karl was the sad one. Why was I bored? Well, I was very much awake thanks to the many cups of coffee I had. Why was Karl sad? Because he got news that one of his rivals over Bimby was in the gay bar and tabled Bimby.

There was no plan to visit any gay bar, mind you. I didn’t even want to step inside a gay bar that night. It all changed though when Karl broke down and cried.

My heart went out to Karl who felt so vulnerable and hopelessly in love with Bimby. Karl wanted to see Bimby. Karl contemplated breaking up with Bimby. What did I do as a good friend? Well, I gave in and agreed to go to the bar with Karl so Karl can see his ever precious Bimby. Sigh.


So this girl who just wants to have fun stepped inside a familiar gay bar again after many months of hibernation. It was as though I was in the same place but with a new set of eyes. I saw things differently. I felt different. It was not bad. It was not just the same as when I last went there with Jess.

I was able to enjoy good performances. I found some impersonators bland. I still got jolted whenever an MD danced ATW. Some things haven’t changed I guess.

But then some things have changed. I was cold and clinical mostly.


Karl and I made some people happy by going to the bar that night. Pipay, for one. Pipay was tickled pink that I was again stepping inside the bar she works for. She went as far as pulling me with her to introduce me to the owner of the joint as 1/3 of the girls who just want to have fun. Well, well.

Luigi was another person who ended up quite happy. We were exchanging SMS the entire time before Karl broke down and cried. Luigi had just sent me a message asking if I was home already. The next thing he knew Karl and I were in the bar.

When Bimby joined Karl, I bought Luigi drinks as well. Luigi and I just gabbed and laughed. At some point Luigi commented that Karl was all over Bimby like a snake while Bimby was biting Karl like a dog. I told Luigi that it felt like we were in an animal farm with a snake and a dog. “Puro kahayupan ang nasa paligid natin!”Luigi found that hilarious.

Karl lit up like a Christmas tree when Bimby sat next to him. He reminded me very much of Ella during Ella’s Carloholic days. There’s no sense denying it: Karl is nuts over Bimby.

I took more photos of Karl and Bimby for Karl’s memory book. At least now Karl would have something tangible to remember Bimby by no matter what.


Karl left the bar under not-so-happy circumstances. Apparently Karl and Bimby had another misunderstanding. Karl felt like Bimby was pushing him away and sending him home.

Luigi and I as always just chilled and chatted. I had no inkling that there was trouble in paradise with our love birds (still animals for our animal farm) until after Karl and I had already left.

I really felt that Bimby has been quite a jerk. He should have been a gracious MD at the very least. Karl deserves so much better. Lately I’ve been thinking that Karl is better off with JC. At least JC is a hot looker. Bimby isn’t even that attractive. Sorry, Karl. Objectively JC is a 10 whereas Bimby is a 7 at best. Bimby would even rate a 5 or lower with Ella.


Yes, I ended up spending that night without planning to. Yes, I ended up stepping inside a familiar bar without being emotionally prepared to do so. And without my girls at that.

However, I don’t regret having done so. I was able to accompany Karl. I saw Karl’s face light up like a Christmas tree. Seeing your friend happy (no matter how momentary that was) is priceless. I’d rather be a good friend than a rich loner. If I only had more money then I would have thrown them at Bimby and ordered that MD to be nicer to Karl and to make sure Karl is happy.

Karl says Bimby is somehow scared of me. Good. I hope that’s true. What is this, Ramon all over again?!

I have a feeling I’ll be stepping inside a gay bar again in 2012. It’s only January after all. 11 months to go.


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GIRLS JUST WANT TO HAVE FUN: Revisiting Tips for Ladies Choosing an MD To Table(Special Topics 4.3)

I enjoyed writing Tips For Ladies Choosing an MD to Table (Special Topics 4.1) in January. Now as part of my revisiting rampage I shall review what I wrote nine months ago and see what I can revise, affirm or otherwise add. 😉


I can hardly believe it’s been nine months since I wrote the post we are revisiting here. Time flies. I can’t say I disagree with anything I said in January. Especially the bit about how good looking MDs from afar might not be good looking up-close. Haha. I guess I just have more to say about the topic now. I’ll share ’em all with you.


An all-cast is a must when you’re choosing for the first time. The MDs will all be onstage and you can see how one looks next to the others. It’s best to see all the options first before selecting one (or several). There are many fishes in the ocean after all. 😉

Even when you already have a regular, the all-cast will still help you see the new MDs and others who might have been absent the other times you were in the bar.


In January, I introduced in this blog our concept of one-drink wonders. Well, we’ve practiced the said concept a good number of times. I for one have given one drink to three different MDs all in one night. The girls and I have collectively given 12 MDs one drink each all at once then sent them on their way.

Once during a big night when Keith and Ramon had to keep dancing, Jess and I gave one drink each to Luigi and Patrick before sending them on their way. We just wanted to give drinks to those who haven’t been given a drink by anyone yet and at the same time have someone to talk to and watch the grand production numbers with.

Practicing the one-drink wonder concept will help you meet a lot of MDs and at the same time get rid of those you don’t enjoy.


Don’t forget that ever when you’re in they gay bar: you’re the boss. You are a guest and you’re the one they all have to entertain and be polite to. It’s the MD who should try to please you and not the other way around.

That having been said, here are a few dos and don’ts:

1. Don’t let the floor manager bully you into choosing an MD you don’t like.

Even if the FM swears to high heavens that the MD he or she is shoving your way is hot and a great entertainer, don’t feel obliged to give the boy a drink if you have your eye on someone else. Remember: you’re the boss.

2. Take What the FM says with a grain of salt

FMs have their own stables in the gay bar. Each FM has a pet. They would discourage you from tabling other MDs as well. Sometimes the FM just wants to be helpful. Maybe he or she even cares enough about you. More often than not though the FM is just pushing his or her own boys to the top of the pack or otherwise attempting to let his or her own personal bias color your perception.

I remember how Pipay reacted when I told him Ella wanted to meet Charlie and that I was reserving Charlie for Ella. Pipay was visibly surprised and even silent for a moment.

There was also a time when I asked Pipay about another MD who resembled Charlie somehow. I was thinking of reserving the said MD for Ella another time. Pipay told me she wouldn’t recommend the said guy. Why? Because his body was flabby and his face like the moon’s crater, Pipay said. Whoa. Dissing an MD from the bar, eh? I guess the said MD was so not in Pipay’s stable of boys.

3. Be firm. You’re the boss after all.

I was firm about reserving Charlie for Ella. It was Charlie that Ella found attractive physically and no way was I letting Pipay get in the way. Let Ella make her own judgement about the MD. Let the guy rise or fall on his own merits and not on the say-so of an FM with a stable of boys he favors.

Even if an FM brings a boy to your table and the boy shakes hands with you, don’t feel obliged to give him a drink if you don’t want to. You can just tell him it’s nice to meet him and you’ll keep him in mind for next time or so.

4. Do stay polite all the while. Be friendly and cordial to all.

Do stay civil and cordial even when you’re being firm. Treat everyone with dignity. As I always say, keep it classy. 😉


The FM could give you false information about the MD you want to table. In our case, Pipay said Carlo was younger than his actual age. Ruffa told us Michael was 18 when he was actually 22. We were also told that Red was a teenager when he was not. We’ve given MDs drinks based on what the FM said that we later found out to be false information. Michael and Red were made part of our kiddie party supposedly only for teenage MDs when they were actually both above 20.

How do you see through the lies? Well, there’s no hard and fast rule. There’s no guaranty that you can and will see through lies though, especially well-crafted ones. The only advice I can give on this point is to be alert and to trust your gut. If your friends are with you then seek their input. Another pair of eyes won’t hurt.


After seeing the choices, it’s your call who to pick as drink recipient. See your choice up-close and exchange pleasantries (hi, hello) first before committing to giving him at least one drink. I suggest you at least hear how his voice sounds like first before letting him sit down. Oh, and remember that you are not obliged to give him more than one drink. If you don’t enjoy the MD then let him go after one drink and pick a new one. Don’t be shy to do so if that’s what can salvage the remainder of your evening.

Go with your gut and with what you want for whatever reason you may have. Just let the MD you table be your choice and not the FM’s. It’s your money that’s going to cover the tab after all. You ought to enjoy at the very least. 😉


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I was talking to Jess recently and we happened to discuss….surprise….MDs. I ended up making Jess practically roll with laughter. How? Well, let me share one of the many ways here 😉

We got silly and I started a list of possible ways MDs meet an untimely death not due to natural causes.  Yes, HIV and sexually transmitted diseases came up. Also death from illnesses related to smoking and drinking. Uh huh, death from stabbing, gun shots or other forms of violence that resulted from an altercation or jealous clients/exes/wives/girlfriends/boyfriends/workmates came up.

I also kidded Jess that some of the MDs we know better avoid going out when it’s stormy outside. Why, Jess asked? Because they’re wearing way too much bling, I replied.  Too much fake bling bling plus lightning = untimely demise.  Ingat sila sa kidlat.  They better beware of lightning. That made Jess laugh so hard.

It’s true however that MDs do tend to stack up on the bling.  I personally don’t find it attractive when an MD does so.  I even told Luigi to leave his bling bling at home when he, Red and Lito joined Jess, Pipay and myself for a buffet dinner.  Luigi obliged and he certainly looked way better that night—–no MD aura at all.

The bling bling—-usually silver chain necklaces and/or bracelets—–reeks of MD aura.  I remember how the people at the breakfast place looked at Sylvester and his bling.  Also how Ramon had bling on during one or some of the times Jess asked him out.

I wouldn’t want to see a tabloid headline that reads: Macho Dancer, tinamaan ng kidlat—-PATAY! (Macho dancer, struck by lightning—DEAD!)


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