28 Jan

I don’t want any of you ladies who read this blog to enter a macho dancer bar wearing your rose-colored glasses.  You should enter with eyes wide open instead—both literally and figuratively.  Yes, it’s a rather  exciting, risque type of girl gimik and all that but you must know that ‘tabling’ an MD is not the same as walking in a blind date or meeting a boy in a soiree-type of environment.

Keep in mind, girls, that you are the ones ‘tabling’ the MD and not the other way around. You chose them and they know that. In fact, one of the first questions an MD will ask you is: why me?  Have a ready answer for it, girls.  From my experience, Banjo was a tad uncomfortable sitting with me at first because he knew I did not choose him. Instead, Jess chose him for me.  Banjo said he is most comfortable when he knows a guest picked him personally.  It means that for one reason or another the guest likes him.

Since we girls pick the MDs we sit with, we naturally dictate the pace. It’s up to us to say when we want the MD to leave or how long we want them to sit with us.  Us girls can lead the conversation where we want it, too.  If you want (only if you want), you can also have the MD give you the BFE (boyfriend experience).  The MD can put his arm around you or otherwise act as your date for the night.  He can also sit as far away from you as you want him to. How close or far you get physically is up to you.  From my observation, the MD will try to gauge what you want from them.  They will not try anything if your demeanor from the start says a clear no.

Even assuming that they got mixed signals from you or interpreted wrong, the MD (from my personal experience and observation) won’t just grab you or touch you. If they do and it displeases you, just swat them like a fly and call the floor manager.  Non-verbal communication and chemistry between a guest and an MD usually alerts the MD that it’s okay to put an arm around the guest’s shoulders.  Some MDs would do it slowly, giving the guest enough time to process what’s going on and to object to it if they wish.  Some MDs would ask permission as they try to put their arm around you.

By BFE, it means a good MD will also escort you as you walk outside to leave. From experience, Ramon escorted Jess to the ladies’ room as well (Ramon waited outside for Jess; he did not enter the loo).  A good MD will also assist you when you need anything from the waiter or across the table like a good date does.

Girls, don’t fall for the MD just because they gave you the BFE, okay? It’s their job to do so.  You paid for it. Remember: THIS IS NOT A FREAKING DATE! Or at least not one where HE had the freedom to choose whether or not to show up.

Do I recommend going for the BFE in a macho dancer bar with your tabled MD? Well, it depends on your emotional status, girls.  If you’re vulnerable, lonely or just went through a break up, NO! Chances are you’ll get attached to your MD emotionally or might even start to develop feelings.  If you’re more or less happy with your life with no major issues, I suppose you could venture into trying the BFE without much risk.  Your head has to be in the game though.  You have to know and keep hammering to yourself that it is not a freaking date.

Prostitution in macho dancer bars? Yes, Virginia, it is a reality. No, not every MD accepts money for sex but the fact remains that there are MDs who do. Naturally, it is possible that the MD you tabled is one.  You can try asking him point blank but I doubt you’ll get an honest answer if he’s one who takes money for sex.  The MDs generally have a hard time admitting the said fact upfront especially face-to-face with a young girl who they probably know won’t be interested in offering them money for sex anyway.  There may be a handful who would readily admit that they have done as such in the past but that’s the exception rather than the general rule.  If you girls have gay friends, they might be able to gauge better who engages in prostitution and who do not.  Their radars are often stronger than a girl newbie’s.

Don’t worry too much that you may be tabling an MD who accepts money for sex.  Not unless you yourself intend to have sex with him.  That’s another topic altogether, one I may not ever get around to in this blog.  Sitting across or next to your MD in the bar, it won’t really matter if he accepts sex for money. He is human still. And we should always give the benefit of the doubt. Being judgmental isn’t the way to go.  After all, we are girls who just want to have fun.


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  1. thegonogradresident

    January 28, 2011 at 10:03 pm

    Hi Andrina,

    Oh, yes, prostitution does exist in macho dancing bars as it does in massage shops. The bar owners are responsible for it, but are quick to deny they have something to do with it. Reminds me of Pontius Pilate! How can a macho dancer live on a 150-peso or 200-peso work allowance? What can you buy with that amount? The owners get richer while the dancers get poorer and the former do not care. Oh, yes, they are amongst the world’s worst exploiters.

    While there is prostitution, it does not mean all those boys are into it. There are those who will never sell both body and soul, preferring to suffer more from hunger pangs. I admire them. Those who offer sex in exchange for dough, and lots of dough, have good reasons. And I admire them more. I wish I could do the same thing…in my dream! What a thought!

    And there are those who can get you to join them in bedroom aerobics free of charge! And that is a fact. If such is difficult to find, there is always a free kiss, French kiss maybe, coming straight from a purely straight dancer. Whew! And that is true, mind you. It is possible after you have befriended those worth your time. The rule of thumb is: you respect them so they respect you. And how do you define respect from a macho dancer’s perspective? Treat him like a human being, not a sex object as most customers would. A person in his right mind will never ever grab a dancer’s thingee but a perverted customer cannot resist the “itch” to touch the show boy’s dork.

    I have formed friendships with several macho dancers who respect me and admire for being different from some other male customers who seem to have a natural tendency to sexually harass macho dancers as much as I respect them. When I was younger, I once thought of working as a macho dancer thinking I could make millions in less than a year and, perhaps, this is the reason I hold these nocturnal workers in high esteem.

    The Resident of Gonograd

    • theunscratchableitch

      January 28, 2011 at 11:27 pm

      Thank you for your input, Gongrad Resident. Your words of wisdom are much appreciated as with your blog that overflows with helpful information and insights. I completely agree that we should respect the MDs as human beings and not see them as sex objects.

      More power!


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